New day, new company

Companies present customers with their best foot forward - just look at the iPhone packaging. First impression is everything, as any marketing intern will tell you. For new hires their first day at their new workplace is the most memorable and most defining. Statistically, the decision to stay or leave more often, than not, is made during a short initial period with the new company (sometimes literally in the first day).
Scrupulous, well-designed and meticulously executed hiring process helps to find the best candidates but this approach costs more - in resources and time. Smarter companies invest in the better hiring process but smartest ones extend investment to the new guy's first day also.

On my best first day
1. I came with signed payroll and benefits forms which were couriered personalized to my house a week in advance. The package came in a binder with corporate information, which included various curious and useful information including acronyms vocabulary!
2. My computer was immediately ready, equipped with all connections and passwords I needed.
3. I was invited to a team lunch (and I joined a hockey pool).
4. I've drawn my first design on a whiteboard.

On my worst first day
1. I did not have a computer on my first day (nor did I get it for the entire first week).
2. I've spent an hour writing down my name and address on at least fifteen various forms.
3. I was invited to a two-hour mid-project meeting where I felt very dumb and uncomfortable.
4. I sat through an hour-long movie about generic corporate ethics (apparently showing up for work drunk and sexually harassing somebody is inappropriate, who knew?).